Have you ever had someone doubt your abilities? Even subtly?
A friend, family member, a work mate and yes, maybe even someone you look up to.
The winter after my senior season I had one of these experiences I'll never forget. A conversation with my college linebacker coach, Steve Telander is a good example.
Ever since I was a young chap, I always wanted to play professional football.
In a discussion with T (as I called him) regarding playing at the next level he felt it his duty, to sit me down and have a talk. I wasn't getting the calls I expected from pro teams to play professionally. He felt it was his duty to break the news to me in a soft way by telling me a story. Story telling was one of 'T's' favorite ways of teaching.
Essentially, he was easing me down from perch of playing at the next level. And maybe to hang up my cleats and move on with my life.
You know, soften the blow a bit. Little did he know; he did the opposite.
Here's the story he shared with me.
There were three micro-organisms clinging to a rock in the middle of the Amazon river.
One day one micro organism said to the others. "Where we currently live is great but I want to explore new lands and live somewhere else. I hear just down the way is a wonderful place to live filled with lush vegetation and beautiful life forms."
When the other two heard this, they were appalled. No one ever left their rock - ever.
In anger one responded by saying, "Why would you ever leave this place? We have it so well. A beautiful view of the Amazon seeing for thousands of millimeters in all directions, a good source of food everywhere. Plus, let's say you let go of the rock, I heard there are several plankton and other horrible creatures that will eat you up. If you get past them, their is a terrible waterfall that you are surely not to survive if you go over."
The adventurous micro said, "Well those are the chances I'll just have to take."
Night fell and a few days went by. Nothing more was said regarding the subject. Then one morning the two micros looked around and didn't see the third. He had let go of the rock.
Cut to the adventurous micro floating down the river. Yes, he had let go and let the current take him down the river.
What he discovered as the current quickly moved him down the river was a plush new greenery. The color was vibrant and new. He passed by beautiful coral colored fish.
There were nothing up the food chain that devoured him, no water fall. He was so happy he had let go of the rock and instantly began enjoying his new life.
"Vince," Coach T said, "Maybe it's time to let go of the rock?"
"Rock, rock, rock..." I can still hear those words in my head today and they send chills down my spine.
This shook my foundation because here I looked up to T and respected him greatly. This was the last person I thought I'd hear it from.
At that very moment, I discovered something about myself I never knew.
This talk energized me. I don't know how you are with people doubting you but when I hear someone doubt my goals, it stirs something inside.
It's fuel for my fire. Compliments are the opposite they're like Kryptonite for me.
I smiled at T and thank him for all his help over the last year.
That summer I got a call (out of the blue) to play professionally over in Germany.
Unlike the advice given to me I HELD on to my vision of playing after college and ironically similar to that micro-organism, I discovered new lands both internally and externally. Plus, I met exotic and interesting people and ate delicious new foods. And made a great living doing so.
It was a defining part of my development.
Let people doubt you. It's okay. Make it your fuel for your fire. Les Brown says, "I make no my vitamin."
When you have this kind of attitude you become a man or woman on a mission.
This is easy to do when you hold a vision in your head so clear you could vividly pull it up on your radar screen- literally and figuratively.
If you think and imagine a new life this builds your foundation for success.
Silence the critics and go after your dream - even if they are people you trust and respect.
Then one day you can write an email about them and you'll enjoy typing every word in your message.
Conceive, Believe Achieve,
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